Mental health

Self Harm

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Self-harm is when someone hurts themselves on purpose to relieve feelings of distress or when life feels hard to cope with. Self-harm may feel like the only way to let those feelings out or they might feel numb and want to hurt themselves to feel something. Taking this pain and anger out on themselves may appear to bring temporary relief, but then as things start to build up again, they might feel like they have to harm again. It can be really hard to break out of this cycle and it can be upsetting to think that this is the only way to cope.

On Self Harm Awareness Day, a survey by YouGov for Young Minds, The Mix and and Self Harm UK found that 24% of young men (16 – 24) intentionally hurt themselves, so people should not feel alone. There are some great organisations that offer confidential on line, or text support and other help and advice. See help and support.

Why do people self-harm?

Self harm is usually a symptom that something stressful or upsetting in life that is difficult to deal with. This could be something like:

suffering abuse
experiencing a traumatic incident
family problems like a divorce
bullying
a sudden change in your life, like moving away from home or a relationship break up
exam stress or extreme pressure from friends or family
low self-esteem or issues with body image
loneliness
feelings of guilt, failure, or being unloved

People might self-harm because they are angry and upset about being treated badly, made to feel unimportant or unloved, or just not ‘perfect’ enough, but everyone matters and is worthy of respect and love.

People self-harm for many different reasons. Some people find it hard to explain why they do it, but often it’s a way for people to let out feelings that are hard to explain or control.

How do people self harm?

Self-harm is not always about cutting or personal injury either – it includes doing other harmful things people do to themselves which could include:

using drugs or alcohol to cope with problems
not eating, over-eating, or forcing ourselves to throw up
spending all our time on addictive behaviours like gaming, social media or gambling
over-exercising and/or exercising when injured
getting into situations on purpose where there is a risk of getting hurt, including
risky sexual behaviour.